Cheez-Its, From Scratch

This weekend is for snacking. And loafing. Because the weather is garbage. It’s all rainy, but not cozy up with a book kind of rainy (I just looked evuuureeewhere for that clip from The Office where Phyllis rattles off all the rainy day cliches but NBC is holding it hostage). Today was an ugly, cloudy, it-looks-like-rain-but-it’s-really-only-going-to-storm-for-about-5-minutes, 9000% humidity, extra frizzy-haired, and the little boys won’t go outside kind of rainy day.

So I have decided to be a complete couchy potato, eat snacks, only cook things in the crock pot, and immerse myself in all the new fall TV that’s happening.

What are you watching? Looking forward to? Missing?

I am definitely missing Desperate Housewives. Sooooo sad.

But Bones is on again- looove Bones.

Caught up on Modern Family the other day- still hilarious. But I think the amount of time they devote to talking about Modern Family on GMA is a little bit creepy.

The Office is in its last season- the kids and I still like to watch this one together, but we miss Michael Scott. Parks & Recreation is entering into its 5th season, and Amy Poehler always takes the cake, though I haven’t jumped into that show just yet this fall.

So with all this lazy couch surfing and TV watching going on, I decided to make us some snacks. Cheese crackery snacks to be exact.

These cheese crackers taste almost EXACTLY like Cheez-Its, but without all the preservatives, of course. And because they’re orange I felt like the color was sort of appropriate for fall when all things pumpkin take center stage (Note: there is not any pumpkin in these crackers).

Speaking of pumpkin… I decided to give the Dunkin Donuts Iced Pumpkin Latte a whirl today. Except that I think the girl that works at our Dunkin Donuts must HATE coffee. Because in the three times I’ve visited the only location near us (which by the way is actually just a sad little drive-thru window stuck in the back of a gas station) and an ordered iced coffee, what I’ve actually been handed is a giant cup of sugar and milk poured over ice. The exception today was that my sugared milk was pumpkin flavored. AND I actually asked her to go easy on the sugar because my teeth still hurt from the last time I attempted a DD iced coffee (at least 3 months ago). Sorry, Dunkin Donuts. That was your last chance.

These cheese crackers are nothing like the DD sugar milk garbage. They WILL NOT dissappoint.

What are you watching this fall? What’s your TV snack of choice? Does your Dunkin Donuts suck as much as mine does?

Homemade Cheez-Its (from THIS recipe at Creative Noshing)

4 ounces sharp cheddar cheese

4 ounces grated parmesan

1 cup all purpose flour

3/4 teaspoon salt

4 tablespoons unsalted butter

1/2 teaspoon paprika

1/2 teaspoon ground mustard ( I actually used a little spicy mustard from the fridge… worked just fine)

2 tablespoons hot sauce (I went with Texas Pete) OR 2 tablespoons water (if you don’t want spice)

Pre-heat the oven to 375. You can prepare a baking sheet with parchment paper, but i found it unnecessary; didn’t even grease the cookie sheet.

Put all the ingredients in your food processor and pulse until coarse crumbs have formed. Add the hot sauce (or water) in a little at a time until dough forms.

Lightly flour a clean work surface and turn the dough out. Divide it in half (makes it a bit easier to work with) and roll the dough out. I left mine sort of thick (see photos) because I like it when homemade stuff looks sort of rustic. Use a pizza cutter or a sharp knife to cut the dough into squares, and then poke that signature “Cheez-It” hole in the center using a toothpick or skewer. Repeat the process with the second half of the dough. Line your crackers up on your prepared baking sheet; they won’t expand like cookies so there’s no need to leave gaps in between.

Bake for 10-12 minutes; they’ll be just a tad bit golden.

Eat ’em warm or let them cool.

Enjoy!

Have a Cookie

Do you want to eat this cookie?

I do.

IN FACT, I would eat this entire plate full of cookies right now if three cookie monsters who will remain nameless (ahem… you know who you are.) hadn’t beat me to it. They even demolished my secret ziploc freezer bag stash that was cleverly stuffed behind two loaves of bread and a roll of parchment paper. Apparrently I’m just going to have to be a bit more clever. Game on.

These were first day of school/after school snack cookies. For some reason, school turns the cookie monsters into the hungriest small people to ever roam the earth. They come through the door like ravenous little dinosaurs and if there isn’t a snack waiting they will rummage through the cabinets and devour all the cereal, raisins, and pretzels. Then they move on to the fridge and start putting dents in all the apples, yogurt, and cheese.

I draw the line at cheese. Don’t even think about it.

My executive decision was to start this school year off right. Tee-totally prepared with a platter full of these big fat chewy chocolate chip cookies, and more for lunches later this week. And some more for Mommy’s secret chocolate chip cookie stash because sometimes she needs a little pick-me-up and almonds just don’t cut it (Dear Food Editors at All Women’s Magazines: please stop pretending like almonds and kale are going to satisfy all of our needs. Have you ever even had a cookie?!).

The little boys were thrilled to pieces with their chocolate chip cookies. And I didn’t even mind when they each traipsed past the plate six more times to “discreetly” snatch extra cookies while we sorted through giant stacks of school papers to be signed and they cranked out spelling homework. I wear the Irresistable Cookie-Maker Badge with pride. I gave the go-ahead after dinner when the plate of cookies started calling to them, because sometimes food talks to me, too.

I’m pretty sure I had a whole entire conversation with this cookie dough.

This batch of cookies DID survive Monday night. I managed to pack them away in little boy lunches and wrap a few for Chad to take to work. I had one before lunch.

Maybe it was two.

And after that … it’s a mystery (albeit not a very difficult one).

I suppose I should blame the author of this recipe for my cookies’ disappearing act. They were titled “The Best Big Fat Chewy Chocolate Chip Cookies”. And indeed, they were.

Still, though… someone around here owes me a cookie. Or 12.

The Best Big Fat Chewy Chocolate Chip Cookies (modified from Allrecipes.com)

Ingredients

2 cups all purpose flour

1/2 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon salt

3/4 cup unsalted butter, melted

1 cup packed light brown sugar

1/2 cup white sugar

1 tablespoon vanilla

1 egg, plus 1 yolk

2 cups semi-sweet chocolate chips

To Make

Pre-heat the oven to 325. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour, baking soda, and salt. In a large bowl whisk together the melted butter and sugars until combined. Mix in the vanilla, egg and extra yolk. Stir in the flour mixture until just combined. Then stir in the chocolate chips.

Drop by the heaping tablespoonful onto the prepared cookie sheet.

Bake for 8-10 minutes, or until the edges are a pretty golden toasty brown. Cool the cookies for a few minutes on the cookie sheet before transferring to a wire rack to cool completely.